So how was your V-day? Did a married woman proposition you? Did you go to a performance of The Vagina Monologues? Did you have sloppy makeouts with that dude next to you at the bar? Do tell!
Me? I made pasta and got drunk with a friend. And when I say “with a friend,” what I mean is that I got drunk and apologized for three hours straight (I am an apologetic drunk; we are an annoying breed) to said friend.
But, pasta! No one wants to hear my drunk stories. Oh, except this one! This one time I got drunk and tripped over three chairs entering a room, and then stood up and told everyone, “I’m okay! This happens all the time!” I don’t remember this, but I was told it happened so it’s probably true.
NOW PASTA. This is a bastardization of this baked tomato sauce except I made it on the stovetop and not in the oven, because the oven had no knob telling you the temperature and when I was toasting breadcrumbs in it I set off the fire alarm.
First, chop up some garlic and cook it lightly in a pan, just until it’s fragrant. Or, be like me and forget the head of garlic you just bought, and end up with a tasty, but not garlicky, sauce. It’ll still be good without garlic, people will just want to make out with you more.
THEN chop up a bunch of grape tomatoes and add them to the pot. I forgot to start off with that whole “garlic sauteéing” business, which is why you don’t see that here. I used a pint of grape tomatoes for two people; I would go with more tomatoes next time.
While you’re doing that, toast some bread crumbs! This is about half a cup of bread crumbs, from a roll that I tore into small pieces and toasted at some temperature (no, really, the oven had no temp gauge) until they were brown. Then I crumbled them into bread crumbs.
Also, set a pot o’ water a-boiling.
Cook your tomatoes over medium-high heat until they start to release juice, like this. Squish them to make them release some more juice. Really abuse these things, they’ll be providing sauciness later.
And add the pasta! Reserve some pasta water to add in here in case things get too dry; I didn’t, and the pasta was a little dry as a result. You want to stir until everything is incorporated. I think this would be tasty with smaller pasta, like farfalle or fusilli (ME + FUSILLI = TRU LUV), but I had angel hair so I used it.
Add in your bread crumbs, stir to combine.
Plate up and serve! Then, because you just made dinner and have proven you are a sane, functioning adult, get your booze on.
Man, chihuahuas really can’t handle their wine.